Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
We are all done wearing pants today
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
