So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
As shirtless as possible
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Sext me about skeletons
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
