Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize