So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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