just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Princesses don't give blow jobs
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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