i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
