i permit you to call me
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
