I need help removing her.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I need to align my fucking chakras
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