the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Randomize
