Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i dont even know how to be here
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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