okay pat passed out under dana's car
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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