i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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