Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
