Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
