Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
