dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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