O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
