It's Friday. Sex?
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
