why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
