South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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