I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize