he wants to bone in the snuggie
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
