People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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