can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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