Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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