Betty ford says i'm here all night
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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