none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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