I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
