When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize