8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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