we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize