You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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