Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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