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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now

  (1-484): View more from Pennsylvania

  sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  :)

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• (254): View more from Texas

  When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  we live in such a classy society.

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• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm never eating chinese again.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.

  (1+61): View more from

  Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change

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• (516): View more from New York

  ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok

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• (239): View more from Florida

  In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches

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