The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize