we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
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we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
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If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"