This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
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From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
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I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.