how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
