Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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