girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
40s are totally the cure
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
