Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
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