I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
