I can text with my tongue
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
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