why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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