Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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