Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it