Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
