i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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