A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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