U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I want her autograph on my taint
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
