Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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