worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize